T S E . Y A N

Again left down

2010-08-24T16:36:00.000-07:00

Been saving money for flight ticket to Sweden. I really wanted to go the next holiday. Setted out mind and everything. Tho we never asked Hin's parents. I didnt really asked mine. More like told them "im planning to go Sweden" Since Hin couldnt come i tho i'll make the move and go. But Hin's parents want him to focus on study and work. So i probably wont be able to go after all. I'll have to wait till christmas if Hin somehow cant talk his parents out. Somehow i can still think positive "i can save the money to spend in HK with Hin". But im really missing him. Want to hug him so much ne.. :/ I really have to wait till christmas..? But hope Hin's parents dont find me bothersome and annoying... If they want me to stay in DK really much, i wont fight back la... Wonder what Hin is thinking...
Been all Emo today. In school after school. I could barely laught. Or smile. Just stared most of the time forgetting what i was doing myself...
BUT even tho i feel like its hard i wont give up ò.ó no no no no. Difinitely cant give up.
He means too much to me.

School started..

2010-08-13T11:51:00.000-07:00

Yup yup. School have started... Actually i was really afraid of starting 2rd class. Because it might be hard with all the homework... But happily its not that hard right now. Probably because i just started xD But if it keep like this it would be nice T_T Oh man.. I have to wake up early everymorning now. That sucks... Everymorning so cold and all alone... But ye! Enorgh about that!

I just counted not so long ago.. And theres like 10-11 weeks before i'll see Hin again. Thats so long!! ;_; Dam.. I wonder if i can go a weekend or something. Tho i have no money.. Im like repeating myself again and again to mine classmates "I miss Hin..." is about time they so counting for one day lol.

Today in class i drew Jerry and Ivy couple Chibi.

Yea kind of new style.. I really like it XD I met a new girl in the other class beside who talk cantonese too. So nice. And she draw too. She draws awesome! And her colorful drawing was so catchy that i started doing that too. Thats how it turned out. I drew me and Hin too.

Which one cuter? lol.

Thats for today ! !

<3 <3 <3

Missing that it hurts...♥

2010-08-05T19:10:00.001-07:00

♂ ▃ ▄ ▅ ▆ ▇ ♀

Almost been a month since i left Sweden. Ye.. We're still lovey dovey. But im missing him so indescribable much.. Lately everyday going home or on comp is always him. Everytime im not doing anything or just abit free handed the words "I miss him..." will repeat in my head again and again. Is about to drive me crazy... (Well it did already yesterday). Yesterday totally broke down over missing him and the distance. Cried lots in the middle of night where everyone was asleep. But im better now. Im glad im someone whos bright again right after waking up from sleep.. Els i'll srly be a emo XD But puh.. Is hard. But should fight on neh? x) Impossible for me to give up anyway. So theres nothing els to do than keep on. Save up money to meet him as soon as possible. Work hard work hard..! Wonder how many people in the world have it way worse with relationship. Guess im just spoiled.. But cant help it. I wish i could sleep everynight without thinking too much about him. Just jump on bed and bump your sleeping. That would be nice. All those negative and pain wont be there then. When school starts will i think lesser of him so it will be lesser painful? Or will school stress me so much that i wish he was beside me? Hope the first one.. =/

Phew. Is late. Night!

♥　♥　♥　♥　

Back from Sweden ♥

2010-07-17T10:36:00.002-07:00

The first day reaching Sweden i was already thinking "Uh oh.. Only 12 days before i have to go back to Denmark...". And the day i left Sweden i cried. Alot of things have happened this time. Me and Hin is finally official together. Made me really happy. And my first kiss is gone too. In Sweden i felt really warmt and loved. Everyone was nice to me. Ofc Hin was the one that always was at my side. Im so happy to have him in my life! Tinge, Jerry, Kin, Hei was really nice to me too. Everyone gave me two birthday cake. The first one kind of failed abit... Cuz the surprise failed xD. But the 2nd was really nice. Even thought i already had a idea of the surprise cake it was nice. Everyone smiled and ate cake. And everyone had fun. It was the day before i left Sweden. Im so thankful for everything >__<.

♥♥♥

I know that now that im together with Hin makes his friend feel annoyed. Over im sticking to him too much, taking too much of his time, and we always lovey dovey around. I cant seems to change it thought... But im thankful for they dont hate me for it. (I hope..) I love all of them for sure! I met Ivy too this time. Shes nice and is easy to be around :D I like.

Now that im back to Denmark i miss Hin alot. Seems like everything so empty. Hes not beside me when i sleep. Not behind me when im at the comp. Not able to kiss or hug. I see him almost everyday over webcam thought. But not being able to be close to him is sad. Both seems to be down because we cant reach each other. Im trying to keep myself busy to make me think of something els. But dont work. Everytime i see a single little thing that reminds me of him a little bit i start to miss him... This distance is painful.

♥♥♥

Keep thinking. Wouldnt it be wonderful if i moved in with him? Wouldnt it be nice if i had Doreamons magic pocket? Wouldnt it be nice if Stockholm and Copenhagen crashed together to one? Silly thought come out. But no matter what. I dont plan to end the relationship. Cuz im still happy. I just can be even more happy if he was beside me. (like double so happy). But i'll fight the painfulness and wait till the times comes where i can be beside him everyday, where i can stroke his hair everyday, snuggle, cook with him, walk outside hand in hand with him and sit in train leaning to his shoulder! So now... Gotta keep myself busy with something!!!

Mom mom mom

2010-06-22T14:17:00.000-07:00

Not so long ago my mom made her rules that we have to play comp lesser than normally. And that i have to be on bed 2am. (I normally go bed 3-4am when is holiday). I got really pissed over the rules. Cuz im a simpel geek who is on the comp all the time. I totally cant image that i wont be able to talk with the most important people to me, until late. But i followed her rule. I didnt open my computer before dinner is over. Thats like 7pm. I cried alot the day she made those rules. She was like "Is bad for the healt and we have to spare money" I get the spare money part. But the bad for the healt. Aaa ic. Every sickness i have. Everytime my back hurts after doing gym, my legs hurts after biking. She comes up with "Because you sit infront of the comp too often". Then i made a joke "Even if i my little toe hurts is the computers fault.." and then she said "Of course!" and wanted to explain how, but i manage to get out of the room. But even so i followed her rules. Play comp after dinner. And almost everyday close 2am. (Yea sry for missing some days). I've always thought that she likes mine sisters more than me. But thats just a childish side. I always thought that the lack noticing me. Since little she didnt know much about me. Only that im clumsy etc. She didnt even know i went to high school. She didnt know i finished my exam. She didnt know i broke up with my ex. Thought my dad and sisters knew. And everytime when i change. And starts doing housework she wont notice. All she notice is mine sisters. (P.s i DONT hate my sisters or anything o_o dont misunderstand). Heki always tried to comfort me. Which makes me happier. But we can only talk over comp. Cuz sms is too expensive. It just went like that for almost 1½ week now. Then today she came into my room. And asked me a bit about tomorrow. Then she said "are you really playing lesser comp?" and i said "Ofc! I start playing after dinner gah!" And then kept nagging that i use electrick and too much water. Aa. I get it that we have to spare because our family isnt that rich lately. So i changed and did as she wanted. Then before she went out of my room she said "I see your little sisters are changing. But dont see you change." I sat there spreechless and stared at the door. I got really mad and same time sad. Walked out and said "I havent changed?? I..." then i could feel i started crying again. And then i turned and went into my room again. Sigh.. I really is a crybaby.. I cant hold in my tears when i get mad. And totally not when i want to talk too. Sitting inside hearing my sisters and mom talking outside in the living room about i dont spare the electrick etc. Though im not sure.. But i dont think my sisters said anything bad about me. Just my mom. And i cried again. When i went out for shower my sis was like "Whats wrong with you?" and mom are like "She wanna hit something??" because i walked abit louder. When i was under the shower i cried out because i couldnt be heard. Im srly tired of this... Why cant i say out what i want. Mom why cant u see im really sad and not just mad. Why dont u notice me? All this time you never knew when i was sad...? Dont tell me you think im happy 24/7. Ach.. writing this my tears falling again.. XD Shes pushing me further and further away. And i dont want to go back to the point to make her understand anymore...

I wanna move out..

To write a song

2010-05-03T14:54:00.000-07:00

I don't even know what to write... I have to be careful what to public and what not to public. Lately theres kind of stress with study. Im getting tired of it xD I want holiday already. But that to the side.
I want to write a song. And sing it. But i sucks. Whenever i get a lyric i cant find the melody. And the other way. Cuz lately i been pretty lonely. So i thought i could write all the feelings down to a song when im at it. But failing lol. Both side seems to be stressed with studies. I thought i could relay on him today because i needed someone. But that thought crashed. Lately from time to time negatives thoughts and memeories pop ups.. Even tho we already solved it with laughting and such. But when it gets dark and im lying in my bed, i feel so alone. Looking at Svenna (stuffed animal) who also is alone. Holding her, tears dipping into her forhead. When i thought i'll buy another Svenna for her for sure. I promised Svenna to find it, so she wont be lonely at least.
But i know next day i'll think positive again. I'll be lovey dovey again and be the happiest girl in the world. Wonder if this goes on. Im missing him so much... But it dont reach him probably how much it is. Everyday i wish he was standing outside my door, or sitting in the same bus as me. Looking at picture of him starting to smile and giggle abit. Walking in the street on my way back home. Thinking of sentence he said starting to smile again. I dont know what to do to make it all come true. What els can i do... Im tired. So tired la. Wouldnt it be funny if i fainted for thinking too much xD I wonder how many times a day i'll faint..

Where do i belong ah...?

Classmates

2010-04-27T00:27:00.000-07:00

Wew. Yesterday in the seat i was sitting. I saw so much lame things happening. To both right and left. The girls in the class try to get attention from the guys in the class. Oh. Does it sounds like im jealous? XD Well think what you want but im not. Those girl even have boyfriend already. How can they flirt with guys like that.. Srly what will happen if they dont get attention. Makes me totally losing intrest in knowing the people in the class. They're all the same.. Guys, sex, sex, sex, flirt, flirt flirt. So tired of it.. I do like Denmark and the people here. Its peaceful and nice unless other countries. But is so dammit ... rotten sometimes..? Everyone only thinking about themself. Noisy when they shouldnt be, childish, immature, and some sluty.. (Ofc only a part of the class)
Im starting to think "Theres only 2 years left" already.."
But whatever :D I have people i relay on. And that are different. And im happy with my own life. Im glad i dont have to join their way of living to make myself happy. Im glad im living in my own little fantasy and bright world. Than a world filled with fight, alcohol, bitching etc..

AH! O_O Late for school... ! BYESSS!!

Lovey Dovey ♥

2010-04-21T15:11:00.000-07:00

How to say.. Love: Good Study: Hell

♥ So in love o ♥

Feel so happy. Probably one of the happiest girl in Denmark. For not to say world.
No more to wish for.

Soon there will be holiday. Still waiting waiting waiting.
Planning about ticket and time already.
Soon i can see you again. Wont i be even more happy then?
How come im feeling depressed already.
I'm not even there yet, but i'm already scared of the farewell again.
Like last time. Right after all of you came the first thing i thought "is getting closer to departing from here".
Hope there will be alot of good memories tho.

Study been pretty hard lately. And abit stressed. But i'll manage.
With people backing me up.

Euah Euah Euah. This became a pretty lovey dovey post lol. Sry.
I like showing my happiness xD

Really really happy and warm~
♥"I like you alot"♥

Gonee loo

2010-04-01T18:45:00.000-07:00

My groom is gone to HK looo.. And all the others is gonna leave too in two days. So sad.. I wonder what i should do then le... Maybe finally start painting ? XD

So today i got married to Hin in Ragnarok online laa. He actually made it ! I was all ready for that he'll be too busy packing and dont have time. xD but nope. He had plenty of time. More than me even. 1st April 22pm we had our wedding lo :3 It was really fun. Not really romantic. More like funny. So funny. Many ghost, and old chinese stories inclued XD Sooo Random. Tinge and Jerry made it totally funny and weird wedding. Hahaha. But everyone had fun. And laughted. So was really happy o Too bad Sigge, Mark, Kai wasnt there. They all were busy and not home. Hehehe~ Not gonna write details of the wedding lo. Theres some pictures. After wedding i did Mvp event for all the players. Tottally owned them with a ifrit pfft.

Im playing as EventGM and Graphicer in www.mass-ro.net So if anyone is looking for RO come make the server bigger x3
Later when everyone went. And Hin had to rush bed. I stole the phone outside in the living room. Since it was dark. Aka everyone sleeping. And called Hin for goodnight.
Kekekekekee i'm Hin's wife lo

Daisuki

Worries

2010-03-29T18:30:00.000-07:00

There was plenty of drama lately.. XD Mr.Tree is having a hard time lately. But i cant really do anything because im not there. I feel really sad o... always always want to do more but cant. Els i've been watching this drama called "Innocent Love". Maki is in it! :o Thats probably why i watched it. And it wasnt that long. But waah! The story is soo messed! Every role have like tons of secret and problems. Its so confusing XD So messed that it makes me sleepless lol. Is really a drama. Theres like no comedy... Either is exciting or scary. And sometimes when theres sweet moment it suddenly stop to another screen with scary music. I guess is a bad idea to watch it in the middle of the night.. xD Ye.. Is 3:30am right now lol. Bugging Tinge abit over msn.
Even thought the drama is messed i cant seems to stop half way. Unfinished piece no no no. Today been geeking and geeking lol XD first Ro and then S4. Jerreh talked o! :o sugoii :D
Tho is holiday im using the time to geek.. sigh.. so bad. I gotta clearn my room soon. And maybe start on a painting. When will the sun shine again leh..? When the sun shine i'll want to paint for sure ^^
Sun Sun shine here ah. Been missing u Mr.Sun >w< <3

Goodnight~

Happy again~

2010-03-06T18:57:00.000-08:00

Yup yup. Been a while. But im all fine again :P I was really stressed and tired that week. But now im feeling better. Probably because of the sun and is weekend ( /^O^)/ Waking up in the morning and its bright and sunny. When the light shine in from the window while your lying in your fluffy bed is the best. (though i have pain all over the body because of my periode.. =___,=")

But ye ~ I woke up so early today. So rare. The only thing im worried about lately is the cafe job thing. The chef havent called at all because hes busy. But im still waiting. And maybe i'll go to the cafe tomorrow to ask straight. Today i played iDate online for a loong time. Then had some cake cuz its my lil cousin's birthday. And then after dinner i started doing fysik report. I noticed.. I do homework after my mood. Since i was in good mood today i did homework. Normally i would probably do it tomorrow or the last day before handing it in..
I did almost half of the report. Heki bugged me on purpose "Are you finished? now..? now..? not....well then... what about now?.. now?" kekeke. Laughted alot XD So indeed of doing homework i laughted and fooled. Then Sigge asked us to play s4 with him. And everyone went to play. Guess what! YATTA! I sniped Jerry so many times today! Muhahahaha~ Dont misunderstand :D is not because i hate him. Just in game >) Because he always either snipe or kill me. Hes hard to kill. So i always get hype whenever i finally hit him. lol. Everyone started to log off. And there was only me and Tinge and Jerry left. We jumped around in different map and got money etc. Aka we fooled around to the max.. xD Was so fun. Then Tinge went and talked with Jerreh abit. (Still Jerreh! You should talk more!) Even if he "tun" me to much that i get sad, i'll still rather have him talk than not talk. For sure. XD I think he improved. Hes not that bad in speaking anymore.

And that is kinda.. Now... I dont really know what to do... almost 4am.. Im not even that sleepy. What i want the most right now is... prolllyyy~ Put on warm clothes and go take a lil walk infront of the house. And look at the stars :D But if i went out of this door my mom would worry and wake up for sure xD Shes working hard lately. Dad is in HK and mom is all alone with me and mine sisters. I feel bad for her. My family might think i dont care for them. But i do. I noticed as i grew that family really does means alot. When i was younger i always though "I wanna move out.. I hate this.. my parent are so noisy". But now i started thinking the other way "I understand shes worried.. She must love me since she worry." (Hmm~ A Tree told me that :D) But yea.. Mom, dad and mine sisters are really precious for me. Aunts and grandma still talking bad about me. So i dont know about them..
Wew! Why im blabbing so late at night XDD!!?!? Better go bed lo.

Goodnight dear bloggie <3

half break down

2010-03-04T11:07:00.000-08:00

I dont know what happened yesterday.. I got half broke down. Guess the machine is too worn out lately XD haha. Yesterday night i wrote diary. And only negative thing came out.. Im so stressed lately.. So much homework that i cant get myself to start with, no idea if i get the job at the cafe or not because the chef havent called yet (cuz hes busy he said), somehow i got alot of costumers lately. Right now working on a soccer logo for a new soccer club. And other friend have asked for portrait. I do earn money.. But the time isnt that good. The guys is gonna go england for a week soon. Theres too many things i worry about. I noticed that they never ask for where i am or what i am doing anymore. Have they gotten tired of me...? Have they come to be more interested in mine little sisters?
Yesterday i wrote so much useless stuff. Filled 4 pages with alot of black words. Im so tired. So worn out. Thinking, have all my waiting been worthfull. Have all the worries been worthfull. Have all what i done even touched anyone a bit..? What are im doing? Svenna didnt really help. Hugging her and crying under the blanket in same time made me cant breath. So had to put her away xD. I thought. "Ach.. Why im so negative today.. o_o oh well. Tomorrow everything will be gone". When i was in school everything was fine. But when the last lesson came. I thought "..I actually feel like staying in school more than going home.. I dont know what im gonna do or who i should talk to when i get home.." When it was time to go home i stood infront of the house which looked so colorless in the cold winter. Stood there looking up on the big house. After a few sec i went in. Sisters wasnt in good mood either. So it just made me worse. After coming home i went strait to my room. And just sat there infront comp again.. I dont know what im whining over indeed... Im feeling lonely again ma? I dont even know what is wrong. But everytime its quiet i feel like crying. I cant even walk probably because my legs hurts. I cant remember what i have done all day... Feels like a soul flying around the house.. lol.
Aiya.. Hope i recover soon.

Back to school

2010-02-27T19:10:00.000-08:00

Sigh.. Since school started again after a nice holiday i gotta work again... ;-; Theres a few report lately. But the worst part is that i cant remember when they are for. Aka the deadline. Its abit stressing... But its okay. But staying at school till 4am is so .. SIGH XD

School and stress aside!
I started on a new Ro server called EsunaRO Its pretty good!

When i first joined i already got help from Sin the admin. And people welcome me :D Been playing so many server. But the longest server i have stayed in is CeresRO and SeireiteiRO. I wonder when i'll find a server i'll stay in for loong time. And do i even have time for it anymore..? XD I really miss geeking Ro so much that i have a gather a whole family in there. Guess i wont be dating around online anymore though.. hehe. But it was fun. The online husband i remember most must be.. Valentine and Poring master. Those two was really nice to me. And we were married for around.. 5 months? Ah. And Ryuukira too. All those are awesome. Online must be really foolish. But what i think is.. Is just online. Nothing is really gonna happen. Why not just make each other happy when u can. And i was happy :D

But ye! People who play RO! If u wanna join me, come to EsunaRO :D <3 Im called
AiChiaki or Ai in game.

Updated website

2010-02-18T18:16:00.000-08:00

Wew.. Today been abit.. Messy? XD Today i drew the portrait that Rana ordered. (I'll post picture in later). That took me awhile since its two person i have to draw. Planned shopping with Li-Chan and meet up with Rana to give her the portrait. And i get my 100.kr :D. So it will this saturday. Going to Center to meet Rana and shop abit with Li-Chan. I wanna look out for some clothes.. Been a long while since i have used money. So yea.. After that i geeked with Sis and Jerreh. It was fun ah~
Something different todaay! Heki didnt come online. Muhuhuhu :o Was abit alone today indeed. After sis went bed Jerreh went offline too. And mom wasnt home till late. But fooled around with Tinge instead. We sent alot of smileys and said who looked like who most. Like. Shy smiley = Hin. Chubby smiley = Tinge. Evil smiley = Jerreh etc. It was fun ah XD I said something with a "lo" as end. You know when you speak chinese theres always those "lo, la, leh" ending in the sentence... But Tinge misunderstood the lo as in Lor in chinese. Aka Ass... Ach. Made me laught so much X__x
But ye... Thought it was a abit lonely night i made website all night. for like..4-5 hours. Been chatting and making website.
Yup yup~ My website Crystal Heart. I found it boring.. And the music was annoying me. So i remade it totally.

Take a look in the test.
www.wix.com/aichiaki/crystalheart2

Its not finished yet. So not gonna public it yet. Its around.. 80% done? But i wanna edit the color and stuff.

Tomorrow i might go to the Cafe nearby my house to ask for job to summer. Im really nervous... >-< Uii.. I wonder if the chef is nice.. Wish me good luck!

... 3:15am... z Z z z zz

So late what to do le..?

2010-02-17T17:27:00.000-08:00

Is 2:15am loo! I just finished watching Hi my sweetheart. A drama with Rainie Yang. Really cute and funny drama ah. XD But also a girly drama. Well i liked it. It made me cry a few times ( _ _" ) As Tinge said... Im really emotional. I always called myself Crybaby.. Are im actually crybaby or just emotional leh..? I do cry often. Instead of being mad i cry.. No wait.. Im a crybaby after all xD Since i can cry of happiness.
Than that.. I wonder if im living in a fantasy world leh..? My thinking and way of seeing thing is normally different. I must have watched too much drama, and read too much manga. I keep making my own life dramatic and fairy tale like. XD But not anyone can follow my way of thinking..
People say its impossible, when i say i can image a life where im alone whole life. I mean. Non husband or such. Its really impossible..? But i can image where i live happily in a really bright white house. Doing the stuff i want. And a relaxing life by myself. Mhmmm...
Aiya.. Im starting to talk noness.. Is so late. But im not really that sleepy. But i dont know what i can do so late... >_< Roll around..? lol

Well better off la :D

Good mood ! 8D

2010-02-15T10:23:00.000-08:00

Wew~ Im in good mood today wo! I slept around 4am yesterday. After watching a episode of "Hi my sweetheart". When Tinge went to bed i went to bed too :3 But wew. Because mom went to work early i slept till 3pm! XD Thats like crazy looong. But i had such funny dreams. Everyone was there! Because i slept so long everyone could be in the dream. XD Mom, Sisters, the whole Siu family. Kin, Tinge, Jerreh. Cant remember if Apple was there too.. And classmate was there too :o Even Hwangbo and Kim hyung joong! XD Hahaha. There was something like a school trip. But Siuhin and the other guys was there too. (beside mine classmates). And we went for a looong "ride" beside the sea thing. Yea. "ride". We were riding on horses.. And for some reason both me and Heki dropped our headphone in the sea.. And said we'll get them later today.. No idea what happened. Siulun.Siuhoo,Siuhei,Jerreh,Kin,Tinge,Siuhin were all playing shooting game in a amusing park. It was so weird.. they played that game like .. for 2 hours.. And suddenly they all went to toilet. But only Siuhoo and Siulun came out again. All the others dissapeared. No idea what happened. I ran around the amusing park in small rain looking after them.
Suddenly something like Mario mini game appeared.. And i catched fishes..
Then there was something like mom forced me to go swimming. And forced me in swimsuit. Then i saw Hwangbo with rainbow full body swimsuit and kim hyung joong with her. XD afraid of the water in the pool.
Then i woke up not so long after sis came into my room and said "Big sisss.. Is 3pm la!!!!" And i spam whined.. xD lol

Well it was a good morning <3 So peaceful. And now im downloading alot of music! Sitting here in summer clothes and dancing to the music <3 So happy happy day :D
Yesterday was a sad day lo. XD But im done charging. So now im so good as new again! Im only worried that Heki is worrying.
Els today is a bright daaay :D (Even thought is snowing heavyly outside...)
Ohhhhh Tralalaalalalalalalalal~ //( ' w ')// <3

Valentine - new year?

2010-02-14T04:51:00.000-08:00

Been sooo long since i wrote. Actually was going to make a new blog. But too lazy XD So just gonna go on with this one after all. But will edit it abit? :D
So.. Is valentin day today. But also chinese new year. I been worried since yesterday what will happen. Will i be alone this valentine or not leh? I mean. Just.. Like all the other valentine days? I woke up today early. Even thought i chatted with Tinge till 4:30am yesterday i woke up 12. The first thing i thought of was "Would he even be online..?"
And wrote diary right after waking up. Now im sitting here.. Dunno what to do XD What should i do.. achh.. Even though i said "I dont really need anything ^^" Im still hoping.. abit..? XD Im greedy ma..? Gezz. Should be understanding since is new year today too *nod*
*Walk in circle and headbang* >_< Wheres my lunch....! Aiya.. im scared..

Alot to tell

2009-08-03T17:45:00.000-07:00

I havent wrote for so long. Uh where should i start... Okey my birthday!
My birthday was 29th. Even so it was 28 we had cake. I made the cake with my sis in the morning. And then after dinner we ate it. Theres wasnt any plan with friends like most people think. Is just home cake etc. But sometimes other aunt would come too. But they didnt this year. So it was pretty ..boring..? XD My sister took the cake out. Half of the family was sitting on the other table. On the right side of the living room (we have two tables in the living room) But sis putted the cake on the left side of the room. I dont know why. But when we ate the cake it was. Half family on the one side and the other side on the other side. Which is my lil cousin and two sis. It didnt feel like a birthday at all.. more like a dessert after the dinner. There was no song at all. Not one of them said happy birhtday to me. It was really cold. Hated it... I felt like crying when i think too much over it.

Next day was my real birthday. The day was normal. Couldnt be more normal. Well at home at least. But then i opened the computer. And people sent happy birthday to me over facebook and msn. Jerreh even made a card. And Appi webcamed/called and made a silly "Find out right away story" hahaha, actually it was that funny. But i laughted XD I dont know why... Maybe because it was silly... Or maybe because i was moved by her trying. Even thought is some lil stuff i was really happy xD thought.. Isnt it lame that whats makes me happy is when i opened my computer and not when i saw my family... Birthdays dont feel like birthdays. Just a day were i have to make a cake and eat it. And i get money. Once my mom bought crystal necklace. I still rememember, still keep it safe, and really treasure it. But money will come and go. Haha. I always wanted a surprise on my birthday. Not just over a screen. But also irl.
Not so long ago i planned a surprise for my best friend, and found some other good friend for it. I had a lil silly hope that i'll get a surprise too. But i dont think that will happen. hahaha XD But im really happy for the online too :) Im satisfied.

Uh uh that was pretty long ago. Now back to today!
Today Kini and Jerreh played S4 with meh. But all i thought about was if they had fun or they found it annoying that i was trying to teach them. When Kini was the last one who could jump over the other side i was thinking if he would get irritared and dont play. If i shouldnt have jumped. If i should hit. Or should i run. Should i stop teaching and let them play or not. Should i let Jerreh be in first rank. Should i go and the two of them play. Should i tell Silva that he can stop helping if he dont want to. (Actually i bullied him too much i think XD) It was a friend who helped mine friend. Must be kinda boring. There was so much i was worried about. Now i wonder if they ever will play again. I think is the same everytime i invite friend to play xD Beh.. Dunno what to do or how to make them happier again.. (not to talk about sis. She just laughted of everything) xD

Uh >-< 3am! Goodnight!

Boys before flower

2009-07-21T17:19:00.000-07:00

Summer holiday is so long isnt it...?? ._. Actually we're only half way on the summer holiday. Is fun thought :D Totally geeking everyday XDDD But is fun anyway. In the morning/evening i either play game or read manga or chat etc. I play S4 with mine sisters. Is so fun XD Shouting from each side of the house like "NO!! NOT THAT WAY! HES BEHIND YOU!!" "AHHHHH NOOOOOOOO I DIEDDD!!!" "YES YES YES!!! MUAHAHHAAHAH!!" Hahaha XD I went crazy today and couldnt stop laugthing of something silly XD hahaha! Kinda got caught of that game. This is my char :

Then in the night time. from 11pm to 2am i watch boys before flower with my sister :D
I love it! x) Kim Hyun Joong is in <33 Woohoo. I cant find we got married 44+ T_T so.. kinda dropped it until is on mysoju again.

Im nervous for high school!!! >___< Since Signe couldnt get in i dont know what to do!!! I mean.. I dont know.. Would people be friendly... Im so afraid for the friends and people there >__< Uiiii! i scared!

I miss the guys in HK ._.

*Peaceful life~~*

WAHH ;-;

2009-07-08T17:19:00.001-07:00

Today i watched Hwangbo and Kyun Joong's last episode.. Gosh.. I cried XD. I already cried in Solbi's couple. Oh my oh my... actually... Everytime i cry i think of getting a bottle and fill it with tears.. Wouldnt that be nice XD Just need a lil bottle! Lol.

Is July already! Soon my birthday. hehe. I wonder if Heki will call me as he said he would. Hahaha. I wonder.. XD Might end up something like "I couldnt call >.< No money left" "The batteri was flat".. etc etc. Lol. Even so i guess i would grab my phone in my hand all day. hahaha.
I wonder if they have fun over there. :D After seen the picture of them. Tinge, hei, Kin and Hin. Wah. It looked so fun. First thing i thought of when i looked at the picture was "I cant even join those thing.. I cant swim and i look ugly in every swimsuit.." Hahahaha. XD Abit dissapointing... But then i saw Heki was wearing the necklace i gave him le. Brighted my day again XD. (Cant remember what i did after).
Jerreh dissapeared lately O_ô He must be busy or tired.. Hmm.. I dunno what to write.. XD I just cried alot 5 min ago watching WGM XD So.. Time to go bed i guess. <3

<3<3<3

So so...

2009-07-05T17:10:00.000-07:00

Ahh lately been abit bored... Or.. not. But the life goes too well XD Hahaha. Wake up. Watch drama, play games, fool with sis. And in bed again... Times go super fast. And everyday just go... like.. Sliddeee Done. Been thinking to get a summer job. But in a way dont want to. XD Totally lazy... and i guess is too late since we're in the middle of summer already. Tomorrow im going out thought. Out to drink ice coffee with a friend XD That is it. Hahaha. But errr i dont have much money :(... My birthday is coming up soon though. I want new clothes.. XD Spoiled child. But i guess i cant.. Hahaha. I really need work.. -_-" sigh... (I say this but it will end up lazying i guess..) Ahh. Abit confused lately... Pretty lost will in life D: Gosh.. Someone wake me up already.. X_X"

And OH! *_* Im totally in love with Hyun Joong <33 Or more. Joong x Hwangbo. They are so cute XD Wish they were together in real life and not only over this program WGM.. T^T I putted them on my fav artist list :DDD <---! <3

Upset and confused

2009-06-25T12:46:00.000-07:00

Wah.. Yesterday i think i made Kini abit annoyed at me. Even if he said he isnt. And Tamtam didnt answer me... I wondered if they got tired of me. Hahaha. Im fool laughting while crying ryt now... So ye.. I thought.. Maybe i would let them be for today then. So i was offline on msn whole day. And didnt get on RO. But whats the use when they arent on msn at all. (Me show offline haha) Then when i woke up eating i got strawberry pie. I thought "Ah.. Maybe this is a good day after all." I just spended the whole day with "We got married" Made me laught alot. Then later today just a hour ago. My sis came into my room. And starting asking after the 500kr that i borrowed from them long time ago. First they came in happily laughting joking. Then it suddenly changed. And we got into a fight. Ah.. Im so tired already. So i dunno. I just shouted "Out of my room" and when they went to wash their face cuz they are going bed. I suddenly got tears. Trying to laught. But it kept dipping to the table. XD And got the pillow and lead on the door so they cant come in. And cried into the pillow so no one heard. Ah.. I thinked negative again. "Whats the meaning with trying so head being positive" "Why cant i be a perfect girl" "Why theres no one i can lead on, on moments like this".. Ahh sec..
Really silly. But since little i always want to be a pure, helpful, carefull and clever girl. That just dont work anymore. As child i could play role games with sisters and always take that role. But in real life is just different. I miss the guys in HK. I want to be useful. I want to laugh. I do get sad when i know the guy i like likes someone els. And when my friends say that like him too. But i always say "hahah XD Nah im totally fine" I dont think anyone wouldnt feel at least abit sad. Well i did. Sometimes it just comes out all in once. And today is really lonely. I dont know what i should do... what shold i do to be loved. Or is that impossible leh.. My personality isnt that open, im clumsy and just no good. I always seems nervous irl... So maybe i gotta change completly. But impossible to do that.. Sigh... I guess my day today is revenge for having too much fun in copenhagen with Yann and Joe yesterday..
TOMORROW IS ALL GONE!!!!

We got married

2009-06-23T09:06:00.000-07:00

Waah been watching the drama we got married lately! Super cute ahh! XD I love it! <3 I laughted so much that my dad said "what is happening in the room there..." xDDD but i got tears when Alex had to leave ;-;
Im on episode 10 right now. Makes me want to get married too .... Better get old faster.. (JOKE JOKE!!)

Yesterday i went to school and found out that it was today and not yesterday that i had the exam... An di thought i finally got finish the exam. But was wrong. XD Today i did... uhm.. ok.. la... _ _" And YIPPPIII XD Finally finished with the exams. I hope the rest of the class do good. Funny part is.. xD You go into the exam room and choose one of the number. And it will be like.. a story, a newspaper, a film or something. I got a novel. And the girl after me wanted to get a novel. So when i went to the other room where im alone, to read and do note on the test i wrote a sms to that girl after me i took number 2 which is a novel XD Haha. The teacher didnt even check my bag for mobile or anything... Oh well.
Got home and ... watch.. drama..? And lay in the garden with the sun in 20-30 min. Didnt got darker though... My legs are still milky white :D keke~
Later my aunt came in and said that i was the lazist person she know.. but what the... xD I see her... 1-2 a month?? And talk to her.. like.. "Hej" "Bye"... X,x
Ah i miss Heki, Tinge and Hei. Heki finally answered mine mail.. Keke~ (Diary'ed)
So ye.. I dont know what to do lately :D Maybe i should go and make a website for mine art or something...~ Yeye.. Dunno what to write more xD

Dissapeared Tree

2009-06-15T17:06:00.000-07:00

So Heki, Tinge and Hei have left for a while already. Like a week? O_o Cant remember. Wa wa and life goes on :P Well used all night today to edit the blog.. puh... But is cute ryt? Hehe. Is so dark outside. Only a blue light in the sky, that makes you see the shadow of the trees and houses. Hmm hmm.. Im daydreamer la.. Back to topic! XD Soo lately i was up to exam. Got bad bad grades ah T_T *Suuuuh* dont tell daddy. But im in college already. So guess is fine. After i got 02 today i started laughting of myself XD haha guess i went crazy. Whatever laa~ happiness always first! Yus. Grades can makes me worry, but only for a short time.
So when Heki isnt here theres no one to bug. Tinge to here to spam @heart1 and @heart2 with me. Hei not here, so i cant ask him the everyday question "You know where Heki is?". But Jerreh and Kini still here ah :D So i still have fun! Play RO with them and msn. Always someone to write to when u want to use the keyboard. Uiii~ Im so happy for having them. Really really. Everyday funny and nice with them around <3
Got a new friend too. Appi i call her :D She reminds me so much of my cousin o-o" Really nice talking to her x) and funny.
Tomorrow going to see Lang lang concert la. Gonna be abit lonely to go alone. But i hope is a awesome concert la !

One more exam and im done! xD Yayyayaya! <3

BIG NEWS!!! Everynight when i are sitting in my bed i can see out of the window. The big tree that always is there. And a blinking light behind the tree. Suddenly one day the tree were gone! O_O I tried to move to side and wondered if i sat wrong... But nothing! I stormed out to my sis room and said "THE TREE IS GONE!!!" they were like "Ehh...?". Poor tree gone ah. My veiw out of the window changed. So weird la...

hmm... how come theres no star in the sky.... :/ Meow..

crying crying

2009-06-07T06:39:00.000-07:00

Crying Crying crying...

Urgh. Bored life waiting

2009-05-29T14:19:00.000-07:00

Ahh what to do... Summer holiday is coming up. For a month ago i couldent wait till it was up, and was like "I want summer holidayy -.-". But right now i dont know... I dont want it to come at all. Everyone getting away lately o-o Heki and the others going HK for two months. Thats like whole summer holiday... well daddy not going. But he's busy with mommy. He's really pround and happy for her x) Thats so good. Im happy for her too <3. And Shi just got someone she likes. So she talk lesser to me. Yea same. Really happy for her too. Everyone doing so much and have so much fun... gah i dont know what to do now... >.< So confused, tired and bored. It will be even more bored soon... I feel bad. Even if i'm glad that everyone found their partner and thing to do in the summer holiday is so lonely. Should i even go on with the dolls on MicRO? And do the work for Null when i dont see meaning to play anymore... .__. Everyone is leaving. People know me as doll drawer. See me and ask me for siggy in lower price. sob.. =^= I guess i lost my point somewhere on the street...

Something from Nothing

2009-05-16T09:47:00.000-07:00

I had mp3 in my ears. Had free from school, and was walking to the bus stop. Like everyday i took bus 200s home. When i sat up i just looked out of the window. While listening to the music i had in my mp3. When the music was about to change i heard another music in the background that sounds familier. I took off the mp3 and listened to the music from the front of the bus. Ah.. It was the music that was in the video from my Kaka. My ex who made some videos in our month days. I suddenly miss the old days xD I got felt lonely.
The song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SyIGwUIHNHw
Today i was watching those videos he sent me again. I wondered where i putted the only picture i had of him. So i went around my room looking for it. I looked in my secret stuff place. Another room over my closet. I could'nt find it. However i found alot of lost stuffs. Picture:

On the first picture is the rubber that my first guy i liked gave me XD Like.. I dont know. 6-7 years ago. (Lets call him K)

On picture two. I added some numbers for each itme. 1: a invitation to a party. That party gave me chance to meet (K) again. Because he moved school i couldent meet him.
2: My ex. Before we were together we were a big friend group who was in my room playing. I played quiz game. And that paper is point counting paper. My ex wrote it. So i saved it. xD Silly ye.
3: First date ticket to Tivoli. A Amusing Park.
4: A friendship charm that i made to a group of people. I wonder if they still have it.

On picture three is the diary that i wrote most in. 220+ page of the time with ex.

Picture four is those letters me and (K) sent to each other while having class. When the teacher wasnt facing this way xD

Picture five. Present from ex on valentine.

LangLang concert

2009-05-13T08:08:00.000-07:00

Yayy im going to LangLang's concert 16 June :D I cant wait x)Im looking forward to it! Langlang is a pianoist who also played in OL in Beijing. The ticket costed me 375.kr urgh >.< I gotta go alone ah :( Gotta be lonely, but i might forget about being alone when the concert start x) Heeh. Bought a new blouse today to go concert with. x) Ye i went shopping again today. used 400.kr... 1 blouse, pencil and watercolor stuff. Ice cream to me and my friend. and that is it oxo"

Nobuta wo produce

2009-05-11T04:36:00.000-07:00

Urgh... Woke up 7am and thinking "Ah why cant school start 1pm..? -___-" and went to school. There was totally dark and no ones there! Wtf D: no school! Went home again and couldent sleep at all. I watched Nobuta Wo Produce end epi. Sooooo goood =O= Thought the ending was abit weird. Ye is 2nd time watching it. XD But last time i skipped most of it. Yeye i got tears ;x; If you dont know it you gotta try it :O Maki and Yamapi is in it <3

RO

2009-05-10T09:52:00.000-07:00

I havent played RO for a while now, but mom and dad wanted to adopt me x) So i got on. Now i got a cute lil swordy baby <3

For Sceneshots click HERE

Its Hard

2009-03-11T10:51:00.000-07:00

Oh man im so bored. Two week left till im going barcelona. I dont know. Im not really interested in going. I can see it for me. Them going out to drink in the night. >) Oh well. we'll see. Lately im in MicRO cuz Heki told me to play. I went again XD Is not so easy to get along with his friends... I feel left out. Theres so quiet in the guild. And i cant make them talk. When Heki comes on they start talking. And then when i say a word theres quiet again. I dont know what to do now. I'll try again later or tomorrow. It'll be bad if i give up so easily right? Tomorrow tomorrow... Sigh...

(later)
Everything is going super now :D

Again and again

2009-01-30T06:36:00.000-08:00

So. Today mine cousin's going back to Scotland. :/ I would miss them. Im annoyed. When i was outside in the livingroom where everyone was there. Again and again. My mom make a fool out of me. Oh well that had happen even since i been born i guess?! Srly! What do you want me to do?! Oh lea payed for the chips when he was out buying stuff with my cousin. And mom said "Tse Yan is the badest one. Saying "Why me" when i tell her to go out". Oh yea. How do you guys say it to me? "Tea! GO OUT TO BUY CHIPS!" Like im a dog a something. How often do i hear you guys say Thank you? And you tell me to say thanks. I do. And i dont pay? I just payed over 800.kr to you. Just out of my pocket for nothing. I could have used them is so much els! Whats the meaning of being a good kid when you dont remember or care about i have done! I know im gonna forget it tomorrow. But sometimes i can be so damn annoyed! Irrrrhhh!!! Okey im trying my best to ignore it okey?! For gods sake.. Wonder when im gonna move out of this house.

Visit from Scotland

2009-01-24T14:06:00.000-08:00

So. Mine cousin are here for visit :3 They came yesterday. Right now they are playing my DDR. And before that we sang. Funny ah XD Made me laugh so much that my face turned all red like a tomato. Annoying that my i turn red so easy ah T___T Why cant i stay white leh.. tsk. Anyway. I was better in singing than CK and Aky! Wtf 8D Victory!! <3>

Back from Hong Kong!

2009-01-22T08:54:00.000-08:00

Weeeohohhh! o,o Back from China. Few week holiday. So now im back to green green Denmark! Bad thing is school is back too... *sigh* Oh man... I hate homework =_= I wish i had a privat teahcer D: Would be so much easier. (A handsome one). Sooo... HK was really nice :O Many familie member :D havent seen them for 3 years jaja. I buyed so much stuff!! Used around 7000-8000.kr... Holy god O_o" I bought a few mangas, gift to friends, clothes, mobile etc etc. Oh right! And a nintendo ds! Is Pink! :3 With pink glitter cover and Rikkukuma stickers on it. Then my mobile is pink too. Is a Ice Cream LG :D
I got alot of Teddies too!!! I won ONE of them. And the rest Tse Hor gave me XD And one from my sister. Pew pew =w= It was a nice trip. The only bad thing is flying. I got so sick..
Anyway. Picture here after coming back to Denmark and all the stuff we bought. (My room)